You always shout at me to wake up
And you scold me for the stupidest things.
You always need money
And you never fail to mention how much your body hurts
You always tell me shut up
To not answer back even if you're being ridiculous.
It's so unreasonable sometimes
It's so annoying
I always love you
I just do:
I just always love you.
You have the loudest voice ever
But you never say the most important things
You never tell us how you keep sending money home
Even though you're the one who has it hardest here.
You never count the money you spend on me
Even though you remember how much you owe me to the last cent.
You didn't tell me that you lost your husband
That time you went back home.
You never show me you're crying
Even though I always see you.
You always talk about yourself
But you never really think about yourself.
No one knows how kind you are
No one knows how much you suffer by yourself.
Not even me. Because you never say. You never show.
I always love you.
I hope you know.
I just always love you:
My beloved Yaya.
And I guess you'll never see this note - this half-assed unedited freeverse poem I wrote, wishing you wouldn't leave me, even though I took you away from your family for twenty years. I'm sorry I can't give you anything. I'm sorry I'm not capable. But I hope you know this.